The Practice Group
Nigel & Jenny Heath:-
Address: Jinglewood House Ltd, Lyndhurst Road, Landford. Wiltshire
SP5 2AS
All of Nigel’s other reports:
2004 NLP reports
2003 NLP reports
Nigel’s report for November 2009
As the years pass the amount of ‘stuff’ we bring along to the meeting seems to keep
increasing. There’s the crates of NLP library books, 3 of them, two other crates
full of leaflets on courses, business cards, signs for the room, and practice packs
for purchase. The sound system, which is now down to an Ipod and Ipod player. The
posters to ‘dress’ the room, the flip chart pads and the poster I put together specially
for the speaker. This time there was also cake as it was my birthday and so I was
also a little bit excited. Unpacking the car at Banister Park I realised we had left
behind the flip pads and my carefully crafted, one of a kind, takes me ages,cartoon
poster welcoming Rob.
We got over the flip pads by using white board pens but the
welcome poster was still at home to welcome us reproachfully when we got back. Here
it is now for you all to enjoy.
O.K. I know it’s tiny! Click on it and you will get it full sized to peruse at your pleasure.
As well as coping brilliantly without flip pads Rob was also dealing with the after effects of Flu. Not the insignificant Swine variety, the much more debilitating ManFlu. Just look at how washed out he seems. And then to cap it all he was introduced with an impression of Michael MacIntyre as I attempted to influence the audience into an excited frenzy. Despite these small inconveniences Rob treated us to a great session giving us a different take on Influence and using NLP to enhance the effects of our understanding. His plan was to divide the evening into two halves and to explore Influence from two different authors on the subject. Dave Lakhani and Robert Cialdini. The trouble is that once we break for half way refreshments, and a good natter, the second half isn’t nearly half as long as the first half was. Mostly because it isn’t half difficult to get you all back and sat down again, particularly as half of you go downstairs and I have to cut myself in half between upstairs and downstairs. (I blame the organiser for this, now he’s so old he’s only half the man he was).
Pig dies from virulent man flu.
Bravely armed with white board pens and two white boards Rob had us involved from the start as we helped him redefine the meaning of influence. “Cajole, Manipulate, Help, Butter up, Motivate, Direct, Con, Command, Wheedle, Empower, Tell”. (Other words are available). Clearly the difference is in the intention as to whether influence is positive or negative. Having opened our thought processes Rob got us into pairs to discuss the contexts where we are aware of using or attempting to use our influence. “Marriage, Selling, Children, Buying, Friends, Enemies, Committees, Volunteers, Neighbours, Ourselves” were just some of our thoughts. (Other contexts may also be available).
In the wash up to discover what we had all discovered we also talked about areas
where we wanted not to influence, such as coaching, facilitation, observing. Though
the discussion veered into meta-
Rob explained about how we remember stuff. (Hang on a mo, I know it’s written down
somewhere. Oh yes now I remember). We have three memories (does he mean physically,
metaphorically or historically?) Short term -
Last year Rob was in New York in the winter. It was -
There are some key points to bear in mind when telling a story.
Who is it for? Your
Target audience.
Why are you telling it? Your outcome.
What’s behind this? Your intentions.
How
are you going to tell it? Your style including voice, rapport, emotional hooks etc.
For
example if your target is your kids, your outcome for them to eat their greens, your
intention for them to be healthy and strong, then what elements might you bring into
a story to exert influence on them and achieve an outcome that works for all of you?
Back in our pairs to consider our targets and how we might structure a story to influence them.
Rob then introduced us to Dave Lakhani, who is the man behind the growth of organic
food sales at higher prices than non-
1) Find an existing
belief to tap into.
2) Ramp up the dissatisfaction. “We deserve better tasting food”.
3) Suggest
something needs to change.
4) Present alternative as ‘the answer’. “Organic food tastes
like food used to taste, and it’s better for you”.
Make sure you add emotion to the
story you are selling to help the new belief bed in instead of the existing belief.
Back in our pairs again we explored some more about the story we wanted to tell to our previously identified audience. Thinking about the start, middle and end of the story. What emotions do we want to evoke? What are the ‘vital’ ideas of the story? What’s the call to action? What is the journey we want them to go on?
In the ‘sharing’ Rob talked about the Hero’s journey and how Joseph Campbell’s book is now used by Hollywood producers to help them check their film scripts! He recommended preparing a number of stories to have handy for influencing our target markets just when needed.
It being 9.00 pm we took the break as Jenny wheeled in the cake, with only the one candle. It was however a singing candle, which prompted singing from the group. The cake was chocolate and yummy, so sorry if by some maladjustment of your calendar you forgot to be with us ‘cos it’s all gone now!
When everyone eventually got back together Rob told us about Robert Cialdini and
his lifelong fight to avoid being suckered. It seems he was always finding himself
saying yes when really he should have said no. His book, which is linked to above,
is a delightful read. He wrote it to help the rest of us poor saps to spot when we
are being conned. It’s actually a great textbook for how to con others. I highly
recommend it.
Cialdini identified 6 fundamental patterns in human nature that are
often exploited by marketeers to produce what he calls the ‘automatic Click -
We discussed this by thinking about names for people who don’t reciprocate. “Stingy, Cheapskate, and worse”. The need to offer more than just a report in return for people’s email address. The idea of never eating alone. The power of appearing consistent rather than “Flaky”.How to create a sense of ‘Authority’. The value of testimonials, the best being personal endorsement followed by video, then audio and finally if all else fails written testimonials. (That’s what I’ve given Rob). Now if you, like me, find this all fascinating you’ll definitely want to be in Eastleigh next month on 3rd December for the very last and positively only meeting left in 2009, book your place right now. Email Nigel
Thank you Rob for leaving your sickbed and bringing your enthusiasm, passion, NLP skills and germs to share with us. (I’m sure you were no longer infectious really!)
Rob has some special offers for members of NLP-
Join Rob for his ‘Persuasion Bootcamp’ in January -
Rob says “In
the Persuasion Bootcamp we’ll take the skills we started to look at in the NLP South
session, fill them out with additional techniques, and apply them to real life situations.
Attendees will leave with a blueprint for applying the skills of persuasion to a
situation of their choice – whether building a business, getting a new job, getting
a promotion or pay rise, or whatever they want”.
And the members price for master practitioner in 2010 is £1600+VAT (or 4 monthly
payments of £450+VAT) until 11.59pm on 10th December 2009 and then £2,000 + VAT
Anyone
who has already taken master Prac with another trainer but wants a refresher or to
broaden their NLP knowledge with a different take on NLP gets a 20% discount.
Master Prac will run for 7 weekends, one a month, January-
So that’s a saving of £50.00 for the Persuasion Bootcamp and £200.00 for the Master
Prac all by joining NLP-
Find out more about Rob and his NLP training here.